Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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