I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize