And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
