Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I'm like, not good at living.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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