so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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