we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Randomize
