so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize