i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
