About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Randomize
