Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
