I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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