matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
