He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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