I'd wear matching sweaters with you
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
