If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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