1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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