It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.