Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
