My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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