Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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