the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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