maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize
