and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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