roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
