We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Just cropdusted the office
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
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