Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
