The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
