hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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