Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Randomize