Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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