I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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