he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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