I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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