Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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