Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Randomize
