You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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