he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
