dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
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