dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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