I'm laying in your front yard are you home
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
