Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
