this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
My butt remains clenched, sir.