Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.

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  (248): Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on. http://tfl.nu/7zdh
  Replies (2) Good night (1546) Bad night (693)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Yeah, where have you been?

  (407): View more from Florida

  Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.

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  (978): Yeah, where have you been? (407): Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus. http://tfl.nu/jpxm
  Replies (1) Good night (1319) Bad night (631)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.

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  (902): I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out. http://tfl.nu/3h1q
  Replies (13) Good night (1079) Bad night (3241)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving

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  (601): Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving http://tfl.nu/z8pa
  Replies (31) Good night (954) Bad night (3293)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...

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  (217): I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs... http://tfl.nu/dm06
  Replies (53) Good night (4407) Bad night (817)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.

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  (940): Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next. http://tfl.nu/2m7k
  Replies (32) Good night (826) Bad night (4878)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.

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  (612): Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls. http://tfl.nu/jpdx
  Replies (15) Good night (3369) Bad night (1393)
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  (619): View more from California

  Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex

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  (619): Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex http://tfl.nu/ckpn
  Replies (15) Good night (3399) Bad night (1151)
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  (516): View more from New York

  I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line

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  (516): I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line http://tfl.nu/kwv6
  Replies (10) Good night (878) Bad night (3105)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.

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  (865): Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night. http://tfl.nu/cs1a
  Replies (22) Good night (651) Bad night (2887)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird

  (269): View more from Michigan

  OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO

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  (269): all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird (269): OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO http://tfl.nu/9b3x
  Replies (3) Good night (1977) Bad night (820)
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  (567): View more from Ohio

  Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.

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  (567): Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho. http://tfl.nu/6eue
  Replies (2) Good night (1688) Bad night (582)
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  (310): View more from California

  we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck

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  (310): we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck http://tfl.nu/7dck
  Replies (10) Good night (2559) Bad night (678)
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  (916): View more from California

  you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"

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  (916): you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances" http://tfl.nu/1xse
  Replies (2) Good night (1128) Bad night (324)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...

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  (801): I just used a thesaurus to write a sext... http://tfl.nu/q8a7
  Replies (2) Good night (1017) Bad night (342)

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