i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
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