Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
You left your phone here
Wait...
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