How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
