I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
