sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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