Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
She even gives head with a lisp.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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