Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
