who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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